When You Just Can’t Wake Up

October 28, 2010 by · 1 Comment
Filed under: Play by Play 

This last week has been a great week.  I keep learning more and more and the things that I am learning seem to be fitting together like pieces of a puzzle.  Last post talked about ways to work on the limiting beliefs we have.  I met with a new friend and she talked about how the affirmation and subliminal stuff is something that she never got into.  I really respect that, her life has been amazing, she has lived in other countries, gotten awesome jobs that she might not have; all without the tools that I work with.  For some, the techniques of having a vision, and knowing it will evolve, come naturally and easy.  For others, the feelings of inadequacy and impatience often get in our way. 

There are some other things that I want to share with you on how to change our limiting beliefs and the habits we have created.  This idea moves away from creating new pathways in your brain however I am using it with these tools and techniques.  (If you haven’t read this post, you can find it here.)

This particular tool deals with our pain and pleasure.  We all operate in our lives by looking for pleasure and avoiding pain.  The problem is, we strive for the pleasure or avoidance of pain in the short term results rather than the long term. We will tend to do something that gives us short term pleasure and get pain in the long run.  For instance, I have been having difficulty getting myself out of bed early in the morning.  Why?  Because the short term pleasure (staying in a warm bed) is more important than the long term pain of all the things that don’t get done because I am choosing to go for the short time pleasure.  The following are the steps to take to work through changing a habit that you have.

  1. Ask:  what is the pain associated with this action that keeps me from taking it?
  2. Ask:  what are all the pleasures received by not following through?
  3. Ask:  what is the cost of not taking the steps; in the next 2-5 years?
  4. Ask:  what will be gained by taking the action right now?

So, using my problem of getting up:

  1. The pain associated with getting up is the getting out of a warm bed, feeling tired and finding the pain of waking keeping me hitting the snooze.
  2. The pleasure is that I get to stay in bed all warm and cuddly and I get more sleep which feels so great!
  3. The cost is that I am not getting in to work when I want to, I am often not getting the walks in that I love, I am not getting in my reading time, or my journaling time, or my meditation.  I am not getting the action steps done that I know I must do in order to have the successful business I want.
  4. If I woke up early (when I set my alarm) I would get my walks and meditation done which give me more energy for the day, I would get some of my self improvement things done (reading, journaling) which are helping propel me down the path I am determined to walk down and I would get the things done for my business which will take me closer to my dreams.

So, looking at it like this, my goodness, it is totally obvious what I really want to do, what I must do.  Even if this seems to convince you, there is another step.  The next thing to do is get very solid on why it is you want to make the change.  Write 10 reasons why you want to change the habit, or take the action.  Get very solid and clear. 

By getting clear in our minds why we want to do it and then combine it with some of the tools and techniques talked about in a previous blog, the changed habit will occur soon because you know it must.

As usual I welcome your thoughts and suggestions!

3 Ways to Move From Unconscious to Conscious Thinking

August 1, 2010 by · Comments Off
Filed under: Play by Play 

Have you ever done something and looked back and wondered why the heck it happened? For instance – ever eat too much and wonder why you didn’t stop at that first helping?  Or ever get back from shopping and know that you spent more than what you had planned on spending? What has been the answer to the “Why?”? I would be willing to bet that the answer is often, “I don’t know”; or “I guess I just wasn’t thinking!”. And these are the answers IF the question is even asked.

We are very busy; there never seems to be enough time in a day. The list of things that we want to get done often never get touched. We are rushing here and rushing there; taking care of the home, our jobs and our families.

This week the topic of unconscious verses conscious thinking came up in several areas of my life. What is unconscious thinking? This is when we are not aware of the thoughts that are going through our heads. Our inner intuitive voice gets shut out and is rarely heard during this kind of thinking.

While thought is unconscious our decisions become decisions that we would not make had we been actually THINKING. If we aren’t really THINKING we make bad decisions. Good decisions are made when we can see and recognize the consequences. If we are thinking unconsciously, we aren’t asking ourselves what will happen IF.  We don’t even think in terms of consequences.  Part of personal development and improvement of our lives requires that we find out how to always be conscious and mindful of our thoughts. Thoughts create things!

We can eat healthier if we consciously eat: we will recognize when we are not hungry any longer; we will make better and healthier food decisions. (Read “Mindless Eating” by Brian Wansink for some interesting insights to other things that occur while eating without thinking)

We will be more productive if we consciously make decisions: instead of hitting that snooze button we will recognize that it is better for us to get an early start on the day. Waking up a little bit early to exercise or meditate, or get started on a project will ensure our success in reaching goals.

We will communicate better if we are thinking consciously when we speak to others: if we are fully present in our conversations we will recognize when others may not hear us the way we intended.  If we recognize these misunderstandings early we can improve all of our releationships.

3 Methods to move from Unconscious to Conscious thinking

 
Be in the now: While your mind is thinking about the future your unable to pay close attention to what is going on with you now.  While you are beating yourself (or others) up over the past your now will be gone – wasting energy and not focusing on and ensuring your now is perfect.  Not being in the now only sets you up for continuing the cycle of worrying about the future and “what if’-ing” about the past.

Meditate: Meditation has been proven to slow ones thinking down. Meditating will help you suddenly find spaces between your thoughts that had not been there before, giving you time to make the decisions that are right for you, making sure you start hearing your inner intuitive voice.

Slow Down: I heard this week that we often feel that life is about nouns and verbs, but if we look at life being about the punctuation, the periods, the commas and exclamation points we can pause and not only enjoy what the experience is at the moment but make room for the conscious thinking that helps us improve our lives.

I would love to hear other techniques on how you have been able to start slowing down enough to think consciously – Please feel free to comment!